anywhere, say anywhere, as long as I'm with you

Truly, my life has become so much more hectic than it was 10 days ago.. I have gone out for probably 7 of those nights, and yes, I think I've completely fucked my liver. Currently chilling at a good friend's house, and while she's gone for a run (I'm way too lazy, plus she just ate half the leftovers from Chrissy), I'm trying to brainstorm the easiest way of paying my phone bill. And yeah, I'm very tempted to apply for a loan from my bank. But that's probably the worst idea I've had, like, ever. The minimum you can borrow is $2000, and knowing me, although I only need 400 of that, I'll spend the rest on SHIT that I don't even need. But I need my phone to be usable again. I've gone without it for more than a month now, and it's hell. I don't even think I'll be able to remember how to use it once it gets put back on..

Called Mam before, and told her that I was sorry for not talking to her for ages (since Saturday night, and it's now Monday.. it's not even that long), and she goes..
"B, you left the house on Saturday evening in a sequined dress, and I haven't seen you since." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Not sure why, but I found that extremely funny!

Also, I'm finally losing my last baby tooth. Yes, I'm 18. But shit this is like the end of my childhood, finally!

Craving going for a swim. We actually know someone with a pool. Not going to invite myself over though, that's a wee bit embarrassing and gay.. I don't think he'd appreciate it hahahah.

I love having this type of chilled and spontaneous life, it's actually so good! Besides not really having any clothes with me; I've had to borrow C's clothes yesterday and today hahah. Me and C had a bubble bath in her swimming pool sized in-ground 70's style bath last night. It was so good! We were both absolutely dead after getting home at almost 7am that morning, and sleeping for 3 hours, waking up still completely off our trolley. So this completely lezo (joking) experience definately made everything very much better hahahha.

Quite possibly might invite myself over to this boy's pool. SO TEMPTING!!!!!!

fear of sleep??????

Okay, I am attempting to be soothed to sleep by the smooth tones of Julian Casablancas. So far, I'm listening to 'Trying Your Luck' (The Strokes of course). It's lovely. Mmm, I think he may in fact be, the love of my life. Except for Ben. My gay waiter. Damn.

Incidentally, The Strokes have a song called 'Fear of Sleep'. Ironic.

It's a bit embarrassing really, this pathetic fear of.. well, sleep. Ok, SO I'm not exactly scared of sleeping as such, just I hate missing out on life. And I find it hard to actually drop off; everything is racing through my head, and to put it so eloquently as a facebook group I stumbled across the other day (don't laugh), 'I can't get to sleep because my mind is having a conversation with itself'. And so here I sit, on my single bed at dad's house, naked under an almost painfully colourful beach towel (the only one I could find in the bathroom after my shower), typing this onto, no, not my laptop, but my iPod touch notes app. And this is because I am unfortunately very good at forgetting important things. Well it's not important as such, but I am finding life (well the three days I'm spending down at father's) quite painful.

Not to mention the excruciating cramps I'm experiencing at this very moment. Pleasant I know. But until you have lived through one of my monthly cycles, you will not know the meaning of pain.

Another one of my great skills is harping on about nothing at all for an uncomfortable amount of time, and just generally bitching about my life. Which by the way is actually not that bad.

?????

After absolutely no thought given to this whatsoever, I have decided to go to Uni next year, even though I've had my mind made up NOT to keep studying after finishing school. At least until the year after next anyway. I am literally so bored with my life, and I had an interesting conversation with my Uncle this morning - I realised that I'd prefer to be studying rather than not doing anything. That is literally how boring my life has become. Plus I have no shifts at the moment anyway, which means no money. So study = less boredom, lots lots lots to do! Excellent. This is what I need. To keep occupied.

cry your heartbeat

Awesome, on my 4th coffee in about an hour..
Having great doubts about the general direction my life is going.
Very very very wired. Ugh.
Found a nice flower hair-clip though.